Pathways to victory over masturbation

For many men, the
giant Jupiter among the planets of our emotional solar system is sex. When the
spectacularly larger sun of Christ’s supremacy is rejected as the center of the
solar system of our lives, all the planets (other life issues, sex inclusive)
go out of orbit.

What a chaos results! But when
Christ is restored as supreme to the blazing center of the solar system of our
lives, harmony is restored. For in Him, ALL THINGS find their
bearing and purpose. (Col
1:16)

Last week’s blog on this topic generated some online but much offline comments. I wished the offline gabs were posted here.
 
Anyone asking questions on how to
stop masturbation has certainly developed a taste for this naughty sexual act.
They’ve most likely hit the habit stage and are now desperate enough to admit
their need for help. They deserve tested answers and may even need therapy. There’s a force operating at that level that requires more
than self-will to handle.

Thus, to counsel that one should
“just stop it”, if they don’t like it is to not reckon with the operations of the addiction and also misjudge the nature of this insidious vice.
People, who have never suffered the intense pressures of an addiction, most times lack the experience needed to guide victims
into the light.

Though we know from Apostle Peter’s
instructions that some, who are still bond by an evil habit may hypocritically attempt
to counsel others (I’ve done this before), hoping to proffer workable solutions
for them.

Their counsels may or may not be
useful but how tragic, that the consultant physician cannot cure himself first,
of the very same malady harassing his patients. It’s either a case of willful ignorance or blatant
deception. I have been there and I know that life.

I was hooked on masturbation for
many years. Having been exposed to sex very early in life, I needed a secure
and constant platform for practice. Masturbation offered it and I carried this
habit like a precious little luggage into my Christian walk. Pity!

As a Christian, I tried hard to just stop it. But like the force of
gravity which may appear absent when an object is projected upward, I’d relish
my freedom until the fuel of my will power, which sometimes was a powerful
Christian conference runs-out and the pressure returns, dragging me under
again.

From my experience, I know that
most men hooked on masturbation use pornography. Men need an image to sustain
the act and relive the experience. This is the crux of the problem. That image,
defiles! Pornographic images which are difficult to erase from the mind act as fertilizer for seeds of masturbation and other sexual lusts.

There’s no debating the fact that
99% of men who masturbate habitually are addicted to the orgasmic experience it
offers, which is often the chief goal. But some also use it when angry, tensed
up or stressed out. It’s a drug of choice for those who have unconsciously embraced the
fantasy of sexual lust as a key component of their skewed identity. This is self-idolatry.

Addiction to the orgasmic experience
explains why a woman or a girl (even a virgin) who’s never used pornography nor
had extra martial sex could be enslaved by masturbation.

The solutions I present here are not independent of one another and are
based on my personal experience and the counsels I received, shared and seen work for determined disciples.

1.        Before repentance,
there’s always guilt. Many people struggling with masturbation repent many
times over and are remorseful for as long the shame lasts. But repentance needs
deliberate actions beyond will-power to sustain the change of heart and guarantee lasting victory. 

2.        Destroy all links to
pornographic materials and stay away from movies, music, places and even people
that seduce your heart in that direction. The mind has to be properly
conditioned to engage in a sexual act. Guard yours with all alertness.

3.        Prayer and rigorous
fasting sessions were my one-punch-two-hits solution. I discovered to my joy
that during prolonged times of fasting and prayer, the appetite for sin,
especially sexual lusts disappeared. I fed vigorously on the word of God and disciplined myself through fasting thus developed the fruit of the Spirit called self-control Gal 5:22-23. Self-Control is NOT will-power, it is Spirit power, working in us to do the mind of Christ.

4.        But I couldn’t be
fasting all the time! So there was a need for a backup plan. I had to humble myself
and submit to several friends whom I told my challenges in this area. I noticed
a remarkable peace come over me with this bold act. Truly, there’s healing (victory) when
we confess our sins to another to pray along with us (James
5:16). I understood that walking in
the light as He is in the light (1John
1:7) meant unmasking myself to someone, before true fellowship with them
and the Lord, along with deliverance can happen.  Find a safe person.

5.        Victory could also come
instantly, such that the desire for the habit quits in a miraculous fashion. Sometimes
the person can’t explain how it happened. That was my experience with stealing,
but not masturbation.

6.        Above all, enthrone the Lord in your
heart as the primary essence of living. Be addicted to the glory of God in all things. A heart that’s not overwhelmed by the
love and glory of Jesus cannot experience freedom from an addiction like masturbation. At the core of
the problem is a weak affection for the Saviour, who longs to be Lord of all. A
fervent love will ask like Joseph, “… How then could I do such an
immoral thing and sin against God?” (Gen
39:9) A focused heart will say like David, “I have set Jehovah always
before Me; because He is at My
right hand, I shall not be moved. Therefore My heart is glad, and My glory
rejoices; My flesh also shall rest in hope.” (Psalm
16: 8-9)

For those entrapped by masturbation,
your deliverance could come via a divine, yet lengthy therapeutic process with seasons of rising and falling. But don’t give up.
Abba sees your struggles and hopes you choose the noble path of war, against an
enemy that threatens His glory in your life.
 
If you’d like to connect with me on this issue, send an email ucheizuora@yahoo.com Let’s plot your jailbreak together.
Unknown's avatar

Author: Uche Izuora

I'm inspired by God’s passion for His name in every generation, which provokes global worship through Jesus Christ. Becoming an emotionally healthy and transformative disciple, I aim to mobilize the Church to engage in cross-cultural missions and raise other like-minded disciples who discover themselves in Christ and seek to present and represent Him as Savior and Lord among the nations northward of Uganda.

2 thoughts on “Pathways to victory over masturbation” 

  1.             There is no doubt that though the word masturbation does not appear in scriptures, it's root is sinful. And really, to track the sinfulness of any lifestyle, if it's not written in black and white in scriptures, we must seek out it's roots. It's roots will definitely unveil what it truly is. And so, since masturbation has it's roots in a sinful act, it simply perpetuates sin. The act itself is inspired by sin and leads to further sin. That said, it is also obvious that the counsel, "just stop it" doesn't work for addictions and habitual sins. Those who have struggled under the weight of one form of habit or the other know the experience.

    You have taken the pains to outline the 6 steps to freedom from masturbation and indeed, I would gladly recommend these as solution to any one caught in the trap of masturbation. The Lord is committed to a freedom. God bless you and use this write-up to bring deliverance to many.

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  2.             This is so brilliantly written that I wish it could be placed in the center spread of a National Newspaper for a wider reading audience and to help more people. The angle on fasting so resonates with me as I also engaged it in my determination to bring the flesh under control earlier in my christian walk around 1985. I found that to be a temporal solution as I discovered to my chagrin that the flesh is such a wild animal that fasting alone is so ineffective in dealing with it. I discovered as many earnest souls found out, that fasting only weakens the flesh, or in my term, make the works of the flesh faint, only to resuscitate when I eat. This went on for months, until it became obvious that unless I want to fast myself to death, this is really not working.

    God in his mercy gave me a word that turned the light on as HE will always do to every earnest seeker. He said to me “If you will stay with my word, I will teach you holiness and I will teach you righteousness” My response was to immerse myself in the scriptures. This is not the platform to talk about how I did it for it is not the subject, but in soaking myself with the word, I learnt what the only way a person can keep his mind pure is by taking heed according to God’s word. I learnt to not only read but to meditate on the word. I found out that God’s word intensely and diligently applied is the only element strong enough to tame the flesh and crucify our members without leaving a scare.

    The above application, lifts the spirit man, empowers him with God’s life and power to rule the mind. We all know that life long success is a journey with brief stop overs and not a destination. In my contribution to this issue last week, I mentioned that masturbation is a temporary relief from a failed struggle with lust. It is not just a bodily experience. Many years have come and gone, I have been tempted with opportunities to fantasize in lustful thoughts. The good news is that, having been empowered in my spirit and illuminated by God’s word to see sin as vile and subtle as God sees it, I now know how to take every thought captive and bring it to the obedience of Christ.
    In those days that cyber cafes were the only internet gateway available to Nigerians, it is common to tap a computer only to be confronted with very explicit pornographic images on the screen as the previous user could not finish with the page before his time ran out. These are traps the enemy sets, and will continue to set such like along our life’s journey to see if he could recapture our imaginations. The devil knows that whoever fuels and controls the imagination will determine the actions of the body and also shape the society. We live in an age that is overly charged with lustful imageries, and we must confront these things sincerely in our private lives and experience the victory so freely available in Christ. Sexual purity is the life of the kingdom and its available to every believer, no mater how long one has struggled.

    My brother Onochie I recommend the pathway to victory you showed us, my little addition is to enforce it. Hope you pardon my lack of brevity on this matter, its just my passion as a minister to see that the light shines so bright in areas people really do need help. Thank you.

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